A sticky story

J threw back his head and laughed. I felt a small shiver of relief. “It’s just that I worry about you”, I said. “What am I supposed to think?”.

Adoptive parents think differently from ‘normal’ parents about child development. It’s our territory. We know that neglect, abuse and the trauma of separation each mark our children. We see anxiety, anger and sorrow, and sometimes we see shame.

Today I find some superglue packaging discarded in the middle of my 15-year old’s bedroom floor. I poke at it and ask myself whether he wants me to find it.

He is cheerful, as he almost always is, when he gets home from school. In fact, he has particular reason to be so, as he is camping this weekend with the Woodcraft Folk, and I am not accompanying them. He beams at me when I ask him what he needed superglue for. It was to fix his headphones he said. “So you’re not sniffing it?”, grasping the bull by the horns.

“And end up with a tube of superglue stuck up my nose, Mum? Like I’d concrete up my sinuses, and never breathe again?”. We both snigger, delighted by the image of the tube stuck up his nose.

I reach across him for his headphones.

I am linking my post up to the Weekly Adoption Shout Out, week 86.



  1. Ah, those moments when your worst fears are not realised!! Excellent!

    1. And that we were both able to laugh about it afterwards… Even better 🙂

  2. Gives us a fright though sometimes ; )

    1. Yes, your heart stops for a moment and then does a little skip and a jump when you realise it’s all OK…

  3. stickleberry · · Reply

    I sometimes think all the training and book reading (and secondary trauma) makes US hyper-vigilant! It’s good to read a happy blog for a change x

    1. Exactly right, Sticleberry. Instruction to self: CHILL…..

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